Once again reality TV proves my hypothesis. On the finale of "The Apprentice" a man won out over a most capable woman. For those who don’t watch The Apprentice, which is brought to us by the same team that produces Survivor, a group of high powered, unusually irritating, but attractive young people are brought to New York to go through a series of Mickey Mouse exercises in an attempt to impress "The Donald"-Donald Trump. Donald, by his own admission is one of the most important men in New York, perhaps the country. Everything he does is the best, the greatest, the most luxurious and the most successful. The show doubles as a long commercial for everything Trump. The Trump brand is splattered over the screen and the name Trump must be mentioned one hundred times each week making all of us want something Trump for our very own.
In a "Survivor"-like series of shows a prospective apprentice to Trump is fired each week until we are left with two. This year we ended up with Kelly, a West Point grad, former army ranger with a J.D. and an M.B.A who had spent several years starting companies. At the beginning of the show it was easy to see that Kelly would do well. He seemed more in control of his emotions and was able to maintain a semblance of respect from a few other members of the team even though the name of the game is to attempt to undermine the competition. But there was something about Kelly that nagged at me. He seemed kind of lifeless, without personality. Something was missing, a trait I must confess, that I have often noted in military academy graduates. That early, intensive indoctrination seems to retard them in inexplicable ways. One question no one ever asked Kelly, as he touted his military background (the ability to give as well as take orders, a trait learned by any Burger King employee who has moved up to at least Asst. Manager) was, “Why Kelly, after the government paid for your education and since you served with such praise and distinction, did you throw away your military career?” Kelly performed well, kept his emotions in check, his ego under control and coasted to the finals.
Our second finalist was Jen, a bottle-blond attorney out of Princeton and Harvard who worked for the largest law firm in the country. Jen was Barbie with a brain, a tough cookie who also stood out from the beginning of the show. Jen was quick, didn’t cry, looked terrific and took no crap. She was so good that the girls immediately began to carp about her behind her back, trying to bring her down. But Jen never cracked. In fact, she normally cracked back when she got wind of backbiting and took on her attackers, including Mr. Kelly, and called them on it. In debate, she was swift and merciless, finding her opponent’s Achilles heel and slashing at it with crippling strokes. Jen was hot, entertaining and very efficient, not necessarily in that order. The girls didn’t like her and, in the end, this seemed to be the factor that tipped Trump in Kelly’s direction.
This year’s show had a strange and unsatisfactory ending. Each show culminates in “the boardroom” where an applicant is fired. In the final show, the walls are flown away to reveal a huge, cheering studio audience at Lincoln Center. This year Trump brought in his buddy, the ubiquitous Regis Philbin, to interview executives and people in the audience turning "The Apprentice" into a mix of a political campaign and gameshow. Whatever dignity the show had, and it had very little to start with, was tossed aside. The only good part of the Regis bit was when he interviewed Trump’s Chief Financial Officer,. The man froze solid and couldn’t speak. Regis tried to untie the poor guy's tongue and give him another chance and he froze again and sat down in corporate despair. He failed his on air interview. Maybe Trump will give Jen his job.
The audience interviewees touted Kelly over Jen by a count of about ten to two. The camera kept cutting to the green room where Kelly and Jen sat together on a couch listening without much reaction to the coronation of Kelly as the new apprentice. But Jen wasn’t giving up just yet and in her finale on stage interview with the Trumpster made a compelling case for hiring her over Kelly. I think Trump was tempted and I thought he would. But he didn’t have the guts to go against the flow of his own staff, the audience and his buddy CEOs who had helped interview in return for some national face time. He fired the dynamic Jen and hired dull, steady, Kelly. So, a most capable woman came close, but didn’t win. America just wasn’t ready for a female apprentice.
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